Getting Rid of Things (that aren’t things)

More often than not, the things that need the most filtering are not things. These are often the hardest ones to let go of like habits, people, or a specific mindset.

Being a minimalist (some may also call it intentional living, essentialism, simple living, etc.) I am all about continuously filtering what I let into my life based on my values. On this blog post, I share a few things that I am consciously and continuously trying to eliminate in my life!

Disclaimer: Eliminating these things takes conscious effort. I do catch myself fall into the pit more often than I wish to admit but I am a work in progress. This list is a little note to myself as much as it is an inspiration for you, my reader, whoever you may be!

1. Toxic Relationships

Some relationships drain us down – but somehow, we keep it. Understandably, not all relationships are easy to let go of no matter how toxic they are. Some are worth working hard for but some, are just meant to be let go of.

Does the person keep you from growing? Does the person keep you from being who you truly are? We owe it to ourselves and to the other person to move on and let go.

2. Self-limiting Beliefs

“I am not good with people.”

“I am impatient.”

“I am bad at writing.”

We tell our selves all these “I cannots” or “I am nots” oh so often, we actually believe it. These self limiting beliefs stop us from taking the leap and trying. It boxes us and stops us from reaching our full potential.

3. Multi-tasking

I know for sure it doesn’t work for me. Often it makes us feel productive and “busy” but it rarely gets the job done. Best to focus on one task at a time, get it done, and move on to the next.

4. Mindless Internet Surfing

Internet surfing is of course, okay. But doing it mindlessly is something we can probably learn to let go. Especially when we find ourselves saying we do not have time or we’re “too busy” for the important things.

Let’s redirect our screen time to something more productive – learning something new, decluttering our home, spending time with our loved ones, starting that personal project, or exercising!

5. Feeling Guilty of Rest / “Doing Nothing”

I am always all for working hard, and getting things done that when I actually “rest” I would sometimes feel guilty. I’d always think I should be doing something productive, creating content, marketing, brainstorming, etc.

I think in business or whatever work we have, there will always be something to do and areas to improve on. But, note to self: your business will live without your Tuesday Instagram update or with that one unanswered e-mail.

We need to be kinder to ourselves.

Know that “doing nothing” (catching a flick, mindfully enjoying a hot cup of coffee, an authentic conversation with a good friend, reading a book, spending time with family) and having balance in all aspects of our lives (self-care, relationships, passion, growth, contribution) – are essential to living a fulfilling and meaningful life.

6. Being uncompassionate to strangers

Sometimes we’re too focused on our own struggles that we forget other people have bad days too. If you look at it that way, you’d feel more compassionate about that waiter who didn’t get your order right, that stranger who bumped you this morning, or that car that cut you off.

Maybe they’re just having a bad day. Sometimes it’s best to brush it off, smile, and let go. It feels so much better!

7. Finding blame / Obsessing over the things I cannot change

When bad things happen, more often than not, our initial reaction is finding who to blame or obsessing over what’s been done. These actions will not serve us in anyway. It only holds us back from learning from our mistakes and moving forward with solutions.

8. Unintentional Shopping / Impulsive Shopping

Some things are truly just excess no matter how we think we’ll need them someday or how we think it will improve the quality of our lives. Sales and discounts manipulate us to consume when in reality, we can go by without another pair of socks, or that cute mug that’s half off on h&m.

9. Trying to have it all together

Last year was one of my most challenging years ever. I’d like to think that I’m mostly optimistic. But at one point, I wasn’t okay and it’s okay.

It’s the challenges that make us stronger and wiser. Admitting that we are not okay and seeking help are not signs of weakness.

10. Getting Overwhelmed with Tasks

This one I am truly guilty of more than I’d like to admit. But I am aware that getting overwhelmed only hinders me from moving forward and getting things done.

11. Gossip / Assumptions or Pre-conceived notions about people

I am an idealist. If you know me well, you know how I always like to believe in the goodness of people – no matter how some make it so hard sometimes.

We should welcome people in our lives with open hearts without assumptions or pre-conceived notions. Make an effort to truly get to know them. It’s so beautiful to learn about someone – and I am so grateful, I get to do just that in the industry that I am in.

Final Thoughts

As I have said, I do catch myself fall into the pit more often than I wish to admit. I don’t find it easy to end relationships. I often get overwhelmed when my list of things to do seems to be endless. My mood gets the best of me sometimes that it gets so hard to be positive and compassionate.

Minimalism does not have an end point – it will always be a work in progress. Eliminating these things takes conscious effort and self-awareness. We need to constantly evaluate if a certain habit or mindset is not serving us, our values, or our purpose in any way. Eliminating these things means making space for ones that actually add value to our lives.

Crossing my fingers this blog post inspired you to get rid of a few things (that are not things) that does not serve you, to make room for the things that do!

Which mindset / habit do you often find yourself having /doing? Do you have things (that are not things) that you wish to eliminate in your life?